Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Refrigerated Brown Sugar

The other day he said, Honey, is the brown sugar supposed to be refrigerated?  What? Are you kidding me?  I seriously had a big tub of brown sugar that I used 2 weeks ago in the fridge right there in the front on the middle shelf and didn't even know it.  I've probably opened the door at least 30 times and just kept thinking, WOW, I need to clean this thing out.

It made me realize that I've been walking around on auto-pilot lately.  Just trying to keep it all together and get through the holidays.  Trying to keep all my plates at home, work, and in my personal life spinning just long enough until I can sit back and breathe...  It made me realize that I haven't even read a book to my son in over 2 weeks.  It made me realize that I need to SLOW DOWN which is reinforced by this permanent ache in my neck that just won't seem to go away.

I am really tired of living this way and decided things need to change.  I want to be able to enjoy life again instead of feeling like I'm a passenger in a locomotive that is speeding out of control.  I realized I need to make some changes. 

Since I am an impatient person, the biggest challenge for me is to understand that it's possible to change even if all I can give right now are small efforts to reach my larger goals.

Last night, I took one small step forward.  I made sure to read to my son before bed.  He had a great time and afterward he said "Mommy, thank you for reading to me." It warmed my heart and fueled me for the slow and steady journey.  I know I will continue to take small steps at my pace until I get where I want to go.  Changes don't have to be big, they just have to be consistent.

Wish me luck!

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